Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Missing My Sailor

Well Brad is officially in Greece. Greece is 9 hours ahead of us. That means it is 7pm where Brad is. I wonder what his itinerary is like. Is he going to bed soon? Are they having class right now? Well I just hope that whatever he is doing right now, he is safe, and is loving every second! I sure do miss him though. Gosh its just weird with him gone. Our goodbye together was pretty precious. Kind of like it was straight out of a movie.
But while Brad is away for 65 more days soaking up the European lifestyles and growing closer to Jesus, I need to make sure I am doing the same. (minus the European lifestyle part of course). I don't want Brad to come home all enlightened and closer to the Lord, without me being the same way. I want Brad to notice a difference in me as well. The last couple of days I have tried not to act super bummed out by him being gone, but the truth of the matter is I am super bummed. It is hard for me to hide it when I am upset about something, but it is also not fair for me to take out my sadness on my roommates, when they see me bummin. I know one thing though, I know people are just trying to help, but I am not a fan of people saying to me that it's only 10 weeks that he's gone. Because to me that feels like an eternity, and it also feels like people are trying to dismiss my feelings. When you care so much about someone and they take off it is hard to deal with. Especially when I can't even talk to him on the phone at all. Pretty much my only option would be to put a message in a bottle and throw it into the ocean just hoping it will reach him in Greece.
With the wedding coming up in less than 2 weeks, I am thankfully slightly distracted by all of the excitement with Summer and Ben. I will also be at the ranch taking girls to camp for one of the weeks Brad is gone too. So take away about 3 weeks, and it is more like 7 that he is gone. haha.
While he is gone we both decided to keep journal posts for one another. So I write in my journal for him when I can just about my day and how I wish he was with me. He has one too that he is supposed to be writing down his experiences in, so he won't forget to tell me anything. I already just cannot wait to hear about all of him adventures. He is probably going to have an extreme travel bug when he gets home. Maybe I will get a passion for traveling, and we can do it together!
Well I didn't want to deny my true feelings on here. This is what I am thinking about right now, and I know there will be days where it is easier, and days where it is alot harder. So I am just trying to do my best at keeping my head up, and trying to focus on how good this time will be for Brad and I both spiritually. We can grow closer to Jesus independently, so when we are reunited we can be better for each other together. I praise the Lord for this time in our relationship, and I look forward to celebrating our 5 month anniversary together when he returns.

Love and Messages in a Bottle

ps. This song always makes me think of Brad, so enjoy.

No comments:

Post a Comment